For those of you unfamiliar with the work of Mary-Lou Galician, she has done massive research on love, sex, and romance in mass media (televsion, movies, books, magazines, songs, internet, etc.). She has documented her findings in one recent book, Sex, Love and Romance in the Mass Media, and edited a second, Critical Thinking About Sex, Love, and Romance in the Mass Media. I just came across her work recently.
1. Your perfect partner is cosmically predestined, so nothing/nobody can ultimately separate you.
Surveys show that over 90% of men and women in their twenties agree with the statement, “When you marry, you want your spouse to be your soul mate, first and foremost.”
Mr/Mrs Right, “My one and only,” “man/woman of my dreams,” “match made in heaven,” “love of my life,” “my true love,” “made for each,” “my perfect match,” “I met the love of my life,” “I knew this was the one.” “We were meant for each other.”
2. “Love at first sight” exists and is highly desirable.
“instant connection,” “clicked right away,” “chemistry at first sight,” “hit it off right away,” “experienced immediate attraction,” “instant rapport,” “completely hit it off,” “it was magical,” “you put a spell on me,”
3. Your true “soul mate” should know what you are thinking or feeling without having to tell.
Connected to myths # 1 and 2.
4. If your partner is truly “meant for you,” sex is easy and wonderful.
Yes, see #1 and 2
5. To attract and keep a man, a woman should look like a model or centerfold.
“You have to dress up to please him.” “If you don’t dress up, you are going to lose him.”
The ghost of Marabel Morgan is still prominent in mass media and in popular thinking. Just think Cosmopolitan and Maxim.
6. The man should not be shorter, weaker, younger, poorer, or less successful than the woman.
Galician documents many versions of this "truism" to romantic wisdom.
7. The love of a good and faithful true woman can change a man from a ‘beast’ into a ‘prince.’
8. Bickering and fighting a lot mean that a man and a woman really love each other passionately.
“Some say love, is a river that drowns the tender reed.” Bette Midler
9. All you really need is love, so it doesn’t matter if you and your lover have very different values.
10. The right mate “completes you,” filling all your needs and making your dreams come true.
“I believe no one has ever experienced….”
“I can’t live, if living is without you.” Harry Nilsson.
11. In real life, actors are often like the romantic characters they portray.
12. Since mass media portrayals of romance aren’t “real,” they don’t really affect you.
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