I rarely use the word claim and God’s presence together in the same sentence so my title is a bit of a stretch for me. But the title communicates an intentional direction, focus, awareness, practice.
I have one more post on single women and God’s pleasure in me. As I mentioned in my last post, my book opened up this wide door for conversations with a wide variety of single women—white women, women of color, divorced women, single moms, women in ministry, you name it.
I have listened to a lot of painful stories from single women—again using the term single to encompass all women who are unattached—and their ache and their longing to be in a marriage.
My heart is full of compassion toward them. The shattered expectations, the loss of hope, the pain of not being romantically chosen, the shame, the pain of childlessness, the pain of divorce and widowhood, the power games men compete over trophyism that happens in dating to contribute to this pain for single women. I have also listened to single women over the years entrapped in benevolent sexism in their churches or jobs.
Let there be no mistake that I have wept with single women as they have shared with me their painful stories over dating to benevolent sexism in the church or workplace. I have no doubt I will weep with single women in the future over their stories. The church’s large-scale indifference to singles accompanied with little attention toward theologies of singleness contribute to this suffering.
And so does the pervasive scarcity narrative.